I was mad because there were plans. I wanted to know what our status was. I look forward with great anticipation to our time together. To your e-mails and phone calls. There was a noticeable absence, understandably so. But the one I did get was bereft of an explanation or any information I could use to determine when I would see you again. I also rely on you. You are my partner. But you did not seem to be filling that role and you were not communicating your position in that role.
Another 10 minutes wasted on the phone where we yelled. Bill that at a .2. I know you cannot quit your job and that you like spending time with me. Well duh, double duh. That is sooooooooo not the point. Couldn't we have spent the total of the past 20 minutes being more productive? (make that a .4). Clearly we could have used the time to tell me exactly what you had to do, how long it would take and the status of our plans. How can you not understand that? It is not about the job or about liking me. It is about managing it and saying it properly. Again, how do you not understand that? Even when I say, "it is about managing it", you do not understand. Oh. My. God. I needed a gun with two bullets.
I KNOW you are stressed out. I KNOW this sucks and I cause you ten fold stress. But it breaks my heart and it made me cry.
This is what kills me.........the e-mail and the phone calls were dead ringers for G. Right down to the whispered tones. This was the EXACT shit he pulled. No explanations. Just brief messages of business. It fucking hurts. For a whole ton of reasons. None of which, is that this is what he did when he was getting ready to break up with me. Created distance with no explanation.
I am sorry that you have to bear that. It is not your fault, necessarily. I just wanted some more details and a lot less G. I asked for an one minute e-mail instead of a 10 second one. No more. I understand everything else.
I say this because I truly love you. I know you cherish me as well. This is not meant to break us up or destroy us. I just want things to be perfect. I love you and know you love me.
Now get back to work!