Happiness Cubed
May 02, 2007

We need a tripod or to teach Ging to take pictures. We took a million one night, well not just one night it was my birthday and I wanted it to be special. These were mostly done holding our arms out and snapping the shots. We tried to just get a good one of us and finally pretty much gave up. I snapped pictures in the car and at the bar at the Capital Grille. We did the whole self timer thing and it sucked, we looked awful and uncomfortable. I mostly thought I looked fat. Magoo slanted his chin up. Whatever. Who can look through a dozen shots of them self and not find some that they are not happy with? One of us has something we don't find acceptable.

Isn't that just true about anything really? There is always something we can find wrong. Especially as Jews, I know that is the gospel we preach to our nearest and dearest. But really there is always something we can point to and say that it is off or that we are not happy. I am super guilty of it. You all commented that it was nice to see that I had been coming along at the new job. The thing is most days are not that way. Most of the time I am frustrated and unhappy. I can find a dozen and eleven things I dislike. Don't get me started, and as I said in an e-mail today, or I will cry. But really, isn't that how everything is in life? We can chose to fixate on the bad and look for it buried in every corner? Or we can gloss over it and enjoy the present for the good that it has to offer. Doing so keeps us in the good and alive with smiles and pleasure. It prevents us from inching towards the bad as well. We can forget that the bad is there and decide instead to revel in the good places, people, times and faces. I gave the same advice to a friend today, keep it even and steady and see where you wind up. If you move away from the negative you will find it may no longer be a problem, you will find the warmth of the happiness. You will find you can live in the fold of the good without so much as acknowledging the bads presence. Especially not when you don't have to and especially not when you shouldn't be giving into it.

The point is you make your own happiness. You live in it and you create it. There is always going to be something to pick out that is wrong or incorrect. Or whatever, who cares. Let it go. Really just get over it and let it go. You can chose to waste your energy and minutes of your day and life living in it or you can chose otherwise. A decision not to abuse the time but to enjoy it and revel in it. Why spend the time cranky and angry about what could be or should be. Or festering in the disgruntled. We can chose to give into the negative and find something wrong with every stare and whisper, every picture we take, and every aspect of our lives. Don't. Push it aside, wipe it off, take a deep breath and jump into the good. Take happiness by the hand and dive head first. It is your choice to do so. Your choices are your life and what you make of it. Make the choice to appreciate it all and make it the best it can be. Choose not to sit around and pick out the ills and the but it won't works. This is not just about attitude, it is about perspective and about acting on those ideas. It is not just about complaining about what is wrong and pointing it out. It is about doing something to address it and taking those steps. Extricate yourself from negative and make them a positive. See things from a new light and in a new way, instead of the same old whine and complain song and dance. Instead of just feeling the bad, take a turn for the good. See how that fits you for a while. I know I can change the zoom, the height, the focus, and my smile, but in the end I just need to be happy with who I am and to really know that these are good pictures. They are good because I decided that I like them and I choose to see the positive. It is a helluva lot easier that way, plus there was some good steak to enjoy.


Blogger JustRun said:

Couldn't agree more.

5:59 AM 

Blogger Cute Jewess said:

Very insightful! Happiness comes only when you stop envying others what they have--or lamenting what you don't have--and start taking every advantage of the good that's already there.

6:39 AM 

Blogger acaligurl said:

very true eb.
great pics.

8:10 AM 

Anonymous dreaming said:

true in theory, but you are so very young, e.b.

8:16 AM 

Blogger Paige Jennifer said:

I still notice my cellulite but ever since I turned thirty, I started flipping it the bird and going about my day.

10:23 AM 

Blogger brookem said:

i love this. i remember loving the other one you wrote about attitude too. so much so that i want to email them to some friends.

and great pictures by the way!

10:57 AM 

Anonymous Anonymous said:

The pics of you two are fantastic! I know what you mean though, I pick at my own pics too... great post.

11:27 AM 

Blogger Bre said:

I love how you are able to start writing about something small and then morph into something truly insightful. Awesomeness.

4:39 PM 

Blogger brandy said:

Great post! I absolutely love the black and white photo... you just look so darn happy!

6:37 PM 

Blogger e.b. said:

JR: thought you would be on board for that one.

CJ: that is such a HUGE part of it - the envy and want. Perfect sentiment.

acaligurl - thanks!

dreaming - perhaps, but why not believe in it?

PJ - true true and I am not quite to 30 but I do have cottage cheese

brookem - they go together and thanks, we really were not even happy with those!

desiree - thank you

bre- it sometimes just happens without forethought, but thank you.

brandy - happiness yes and lots of other good substances too.

7:01 AM 

Blogger Mel said:


This was awesome!

8:20 AM 

Blogger Mel said:

p.s. best quote ever...for anyone who might doubt that happiness is something you make for yourself.

"Happiness is a conscious choice, not an automatic response."~Mildred Barthel

That has gotten me through some of the hardest times in my life....

8:24 AM 

Blogger e.b. said:

Mel that is a great quote. Thank you for sharing.

10:53 AM 

Blogger Accidentally Me said:

Hey...you know, Magoo is pretty cute:-)

I'm with Brandy...the b&w one in the lower left is adorable!

7:26 AM 

Blogger damien said:

i stumbled across your blog via sticks of fire... i didn't know this existed! awesome. and he's adorable, how come you never bring him around???

8:46 AM 

Blogger e.b. said:

is this damien - as in rachel's damien? which i hate saying but you know what i mean assuming it is

8:47 AM 

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